It's the Quantity, Not the Quality...Or is it?
I see it on TV, I read it everywhere. When you've been out of the dating loop awhile, the best plan of attack is quantity. Go out with every guy who asks whether you want to or not. Whether he's your type or not. Whether you're attracted or not. Whether he has green bumps all over his face or not.
Really? I mean really? I understand that the idea is to get yourself out there. I get that. Really. I do. But really? My dating pool for the last several months has completely dried up. The mud in the bottom is cracked and it doesn't look like rain any time soon. I figured the problem is that I need to put myself out there more. I thought long and hard about what to do. Meeting men in Mapdot, KS, is a little like meeting men on the moon. Seriously. It's that geographically challenging. Supermarkets, gyms, Lowe's, blah, blah, blah. I go to all of those places. I've met exactly zero men. I gave up online dating because I suffered a little (read a lot) burnout.
After giving it some thought, I decided I was ready to try online dating again. I've been absent from it for about a year. I thought maybe the dating pool over at PlentyOfFish.com had some new fish in it. I recreated a profile. It sucked. But within minutes the emails began to roll in. You know, new meat and all.
A few seemed promising. One asked me to tell him something about me that wasn't in my profile. Hmmm...okay. I put a lot of thought into that email. I was damn proud of it and, I never heard from him again. The next was Phone Guy. I cut him lose last weekend after pointing out to him that asking me to call in almost every email was pushing. I actually had a date scheduled with the third. Right up until I did some background research and developed a migraine. Oh and The Math Teacher is there too. Frickin' lovely.
The profile needed help. My friend Anita, who must have been POF's first member and who I've know for a couple of years, helped me fix it up. It still sucks, but I'm spent. The emails have pretty much dried up. The new has already worn off of me. Once in awhile I get one and when I look at the profile, I just wanna say, "Really? Quantity, not quality?" Because if it was really quantity, I'd be hooked up.
But when I think about responding and meeting this person I know I'm not interested in, my tummy churns. Why? Why is about quantity? And is quantity even right? Is it right for me to respond, chit chat, schedule a date, etc. knowing I'm not interested? It doesn't seem fair to the dude with hair down to the middle of his back wanting to know if I like men with long hair. Or to the biker dude who's way past his expiration date. Or to the guy who's older than I prefer and who wanted me to drop everything at almost a moment's notice and drive to Wichita to party. Quantity? Really?
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